it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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