He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize