Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
