What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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