About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
