Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize