I wish i was in the wii world.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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