So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
