I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
You are a genius and a whore.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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