hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
