tell your sister to shave her snatch
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
