We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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