Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
