Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
