I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
