i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize