it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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