did you get engaged???
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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