That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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