There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
