I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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