His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I FOUND THE LEGS
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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