I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
