fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize