i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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