When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line