'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize