there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
