I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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