Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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