Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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