grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize