Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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