Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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