First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize