what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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