We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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