I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
