What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize