I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize