yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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