i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
