Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Oh god it's open bar.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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