shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
