The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize