Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
