shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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