Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
