Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
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