i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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