Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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